I'd been nursing a bottle of chloraseptic, but it stopped helping yesterday so I went in for a deeper look in the mirror and found what looked like a tonsil stone right where the pain was. I took a curette and, with a flashlight, scooped it out like a 2nd-trimester abortion and spat it into the sink with minimal bleeding. When I woke up today the pain was only about 25% of the days before and I can eat just fine. I've never had a tonsil stone so I don't know if it actually was one or just some nast stuck to/exuded by my tonsil, but it sure seemed to be what was putting the hurt on me.
I got another bookshelf, desk, and wine rack yesterday also; boss.