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emasculation and emousculation

A few days ago I picked up a piece of furniture I ordered online, a butcher-block table for my kitchen. It was in a triple-strapped package in cardboard. After work I grabbed it to carry inside, something like 75 yards from truck to door, and I saw that the package was 55 pounds, so no prob. I flipped it out of the bed of my truck onto my back and walked towards my apartment. I grew an inch shorter with every step until I got to the door, where I was a true quasimodo. I couldn't even lean back to slide it down I was so cramped. I just flipped it backwards and shook the ground. I looked back and realized it was 55 kilograms and not pounds. I felt like kind of a goof, but I did feel a little exonerated since I was wondering just how weak I'd gotten over one week.

In other news, if you were wondering what mashed up mouse testicles smells like....smells pretty yuck. I've got 24 mouse balls chilling in my freezer now, and although they were fun to take out, doing anything with them is a pain.

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Comments

( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
just_the_ash
Feb. 2nd, 2008 01:05 am (UTC)
Dude. Just use an optical mouse. They don't have balls....
silversledge
Feb. 3rd, 2008 02:16 pm (UTC)
So 55 kilos is like 120 lbs. You've carried more than that around on your back. Remember the race through the parking lot? Course, you did puke afterwards...
floyd_mephit
Feb. 3rd, 2008 06:05 pm (UTC)
Yea but that was 10 years and a few dozen pounds ago when I was a spry wee lad.. Also I think I had an adrenalin boost helping out there; no screaming 11 year olds up here for motivation. Most of the problem was I was centering the weight right on the back of my neck which was really throwing my chakras out of alignment.
silversledge
Feb. 4th, 2008 03:24 am (UTC)
Hmmm, screaming 11 year olds always makes it more fun. And yeah, I mean it that way.
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )